Men are funny about things like that

Having once lived in the enemy camp, as it were, one of the many things I now enjoy in being the woman I have always believed I was meant to be is that I can usually find ways to make the best use of my time, such as standing in a long line to use a public women’s restroom. I always use the wait as an opportunity to meet my neighbors in the line.  On rare occasions while living in the enemy camp, I have observed some men doing that, but most of the time they seemed to be far more focused on doing their business as quickly as possible, simply because THEY CAN!

Another thing I have observed in many men is that men can sometimes be impatient when they have to wait to use a gender-neutral one seater and a woman is taking more time than men think she should.   Sometime last fall I was at my gym and witnessed a man say out loud in the presence of myself and another woman “Women don’t seem to know how to hurry up.”  I held my tongue but wanted to say to him “If you had blood coming out of your ass or some other downstairs orifice on a monthly cycle or had to wrangle in and out of your clothes just to pee as we sometimes must do, or even bothered to wash your hands and check your makeup and such every time you used a toilet, you wouldn’t be so quick to judge.” The other woman seemed puzzled probably because she doesn’t have the inside dope on men like I do. She remarked “What’s his problem!”  I turned face to her and she to mine and we both burst out laughing. I don’t know about her, but it made my day!

On the subject of toilet seats, one of the first things I immediately noticed at the beginning of my transition when I only would pee sitting down brought a new understanding about why woman insist that men put the toilet seat down after peeing, especially in the woman’s own home where she can reasonably expect it to be down. It made total sense why men often seem oblivious, even to the point of making a snide sexist remark about why we insist upon it.  If men had to always turn hind side when approaching a toilet, especially at night, they might understand. Or would they?

Men really are funny about things like that. Still, ya gotta love em!

Deanna Joy






About Deanna Joy Hallmark

I am a post-op transgender woman who has now completed transition and living my life as the woman I was born to be. I have been writing my blog, now titled "A Spy in the Enemy Camp - A transgender woman’s perspective from having lived as a man among men" since December 2011. Originally a record of my process and feelings in transition, last summer in 2013 it took on observations from both sides of the gender binary and now will also be looking at my past life pretending to be the man I never was and how it finally brought me to where I am today, the beautiful intelligent woman I had always believed I should have been since I was little.
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