Finally the Countdown Begins

According to my calculations, 215 days from today, February 20, 2014, I will be having my Gender Reassignment Surgery (GRS), what I prefer to call Gender Affirmation Surgery, although the acronym would then be “GAS.”  It will be a “gas” but it still sounds funny to me plus the medical profession no longer utilizes a gas as an anesthesia anymore. Still I like the term for what was once referred to as a “sex change,” a term common to most who have not had the desire or inclination of having such a procedure.

I had wanted to have my surgery before the Symposium, but the medical team at the Preecha Aesthetic Institute discussed my situation and they agree that having to sit for long periods of time after my surgery would be both very uncomfortable for me along with not being recommended because of my need to heal myself as much as possible when still in Thailand, before returning home to a life I have yet to foresee for myself as the woman I have always wanted to be which I now know was the woman I have always been.

I would be remiss if I didn’t say the customary “I can’t wait” but the fact is that not only can I wait, I must wait wait because I have plenty of work to do over the next 7 months to pull together all the financial resources I will need for the surgery, the WPATH Symposium, travel and lodging plus any incidentals I might want, such as some Thai silk finery, an opportunity that this girl just can’t pass up, not on her life.

The weather has been extremely chilly this past Spring, even into late May, so I haven’t had the energy or motivation to start organizing an on going “Estate Sale” to not only simplify my life, but to part with the many possessions that own me more than I do them.  These items include the many collectables and household items that I no longer want or need, that my late beloved and I amassed over the 24 years in our Santa Fe home.  There is also 70+ piece inventory of framed artwork, most of which are my own, or rather should I say, David’s work produced from more than a decade ago until most recently.

Lastly, there is furniture that I will never really need to feel at home as long as I shall remain in it.  After my return home, I also will need to have ductwork built from the front room wall furnace to heat the two bedrooms that are now being used to organize and sell my possessions, so that I can take in a tenant, which could be a woman with whom I have an intimate relationship, if at all possible, the like of which has also my secondary intention for 2013 to have a new partner.

Another task I must perform is the recommended hair removal on and around my private area and I have already set up a consultation with a spa in Albuquerque, about an hour’s drive away, to do just that.  In the meantime, over the last couple of days, or more rather, nights, I have begun the process to organize everything with which I will need or want to part so that I can begin the Estate Sale within the next couple of weeks.  I think also I should update my employment history on Facebook to include inventory manager and sales specialist.

One last thing I must do is get myself down to “fighting weight”, so to speak, as close as possible, to the 160 lbs I weighed when I was in high school when I played on the Junior Varsity football team at the Narimasu Tokyo American High School. If you want to see a picture, I refer back to a post I wrote on September 16, 2012 entitled “I love my boobs.”

Toward that end, I have have set my intention and am letting my body, not my thoughts or feelings, direct me to the right foods and the quantity I consume each day, that I know is now already reflected in the way I am loving my body and my life to its fullest,  a body in which I hope to spend many good years living, as the full-fledged woman and girl of which I have always dreamed.

Deanna Joy


About Deanna Joy Hallmark

I am a post-op transgender woman who has now completed transition and living my life as the woman I was born to be. I have been writing my blog, now titled "A Spy in the Enemy Camp - A transgender woman’s perspective from having lived as a man among men" since December 2011. Originally a record of my process and feelings in transition, last summer in 2013 it took on observations from both sides of the gender binary and now will also be looking at my past life pretending to be the man I never was and how it finally brought me to where I am today, the beautiful intelligent woman I had always believed I should have been since I was little.
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2 Responses to Finally the Countdown Begins

  1. lizelth says:

    Just a small observation, Deanna, but did you know that SRS is also often called Gender Confirmation Surgery (GCS)? You might find that name and acronym both more comfortable and more frequently recognized too!

    Regardless, congratulations to you! Please do keep all your followers updated when the big day arrives and during your recovery. Do be patient with yourself and follow your doctor’s instructions as faithfully as possible. Though I am a bit further away from GCS than you are, everything I’ve read says that following our doctor’s instructions faithfully is the best way to insure a proper and complete healing after the surgery.

    • Thanks Liz, I forgot about that alternative and I think I shall start using it.instead. Still, I wanted to add a bit of levity in my update because it is part of who I am, a woman who strives to not take myself too seriously and to always look for the lesson in all situations, especially those situations where laughter is not my first choice of response.
      I have always planned to take my laptop with me so that I can update my progress and furthermore, to share updates from the Symposium while they are fresh in my mind. I can also send updates from my smartphone to those special people in my life who have given me so much love and support over these past 19 months.

      Deanna Joy (emphasis on Joy)

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